Labeling Emotions: A Simple Tool to Help Children Manage Big Feelings

Big emotions are a normal part of childhood, but they can also feel confusing and overwhelming. One of the most powerful tools we can teach children to help them handle those feelings is surprisingly simple: labeling their emotions. This strategy, coined “Name it to tame it” by Dr. Daniel Siegel, helps kids understand what they are feeling so they can start to manage those emotions in a healthy way.

When a child names their feelings, like saying “I feel nervous” or “I’m sad,” it activates the logical part of the brain (the prefrontal cortex). This helps calm the emotional center of the brain (the amygdala), which is responsible for fear, alarm, and strong emotional reactions. Labeling emotions does not make them disappear. What it does is reduce the intensity of the emotion, allowing children to feel more in control. Over time, this practice builds emotional awareness and helps children respond instead of react.

Here are some examples of children putting words to their feelings:

• “I’m nervous about going to school tomorrow.”
• “I’m so excited, I can’t sit still!”
• “I’m mad because I didn’t get a turn.”

Young children may not always have the words to describe what’s going on inside. That’s where visual tools like feelings charts and emotion wheels can help. These tools give kids a visual language to match their internal experience. I often encourage families to use these tools at home, not just during tough moments, but as part of everyday conversations. Naming feelings during calm times helps normalize emotional expression and builds a strong foundation for emotional health.

Emotional awareness is a skill that can be taught – and it starts with us. When adults model emotional labeling (“I feel really frustrated right now, and I need a break”), kids learn to do the same.

The next time your child is having a big feeling, invite them to pause and ask themselves, “What am I feeling right now?” Giving that feeling a name is a powerful step toward handling it with confidence and care. Helping kids “name it to tame it” isn’t just a strategy – it’s an invitation to connect, to co-regulate, and to build lifelong emotional resilience.